Thursday, February 28, 2013

fur coats, reminders, and my personal version of fact vs. fiction

Fiction: You can "simply decide" to "be happy".
Fact: You can make conscious choices to be a better version of yourself, but these changes will take time.
While you can decide to change elements of your thinking, (trying to focus on the positive, mentally letting go of things, etc.) it's just not possible to sit down in front of a mirror, look yourself square in the eye, and declare that FROM THIS MOMENT ON, you will be unwaveringly and completely happy. First off, no one is 100% happy 100% of the time. Secondly, while your brain is pretty effing awesome, there is no switch to automatically control emotions. Immediate happiness isn't a thing, guys, and expecting magical results and not receiving them will only make you sad...which, in case you didn't know, is sort of the polar opposite of happy. You can't expect yourself to become an entirely new person overnight. You're not the inside of a junky house; you can't just slap on some paint, clean the windows, gut the basement, and be instantly perfect. Cut yourself some slack, gorgeous.
Fiction: You have to wait for a sign to start doing something you love.
Fact: If you know you love something enough to want to do it, THAT IS YOUR SIGN.
Whole-heartedly wanting to do something is all the proof from God/the Universe/your mother that you ever need. I know I've talked about this idea of doing exactly what you want to do simply because you want to do it, but I'll repeat myself until I'm blue in the face. YOU BEING YOU is the only reason necessary to kick life in the nards. Or cut all your hair off. Or switch careers. Or flirt shamelessly with the sexy barista at the coffee shop you go to that's cuter than Starbucks, but doesn't have chai quite as good.
Fiction: Love is never having to say you're sorry.
Fact: What? I just. What? I'm pretty sure love is caring enough about the other person and how they feel to apologize when you're a jerk.
And we're all jerks, sometime or other. If I cancel on friends, (or my loverrrr in the night-times), I do appreciate a certain level of understanding because they like me, but that doesn't mean I don't offer a genuine sorry. Just because someone loves you inside and out doesn't mean you can stop doing things considered basic courtesies that demonstrate how much you respect them as people. Love isn't a free pass to be an asshole unapologetically to the people you care about. If anything, the L-word grants you permission to step outside your comfort zone and do just a little bit more to remind those around you just how absolutely exceptional they are.
Fiction: I only update every Sunday so I can yell, "SUNDAY FUNDAY," from the top of every proverbial rooftop that has ever existed ever and also wear my pajamas all the live-long day.
Which is usually Sundays. But I'm moving this weekend (hooray!), so here's my self-promised weekly rambling a few days early. Thursday Fursday? Do people still wear furs? Would I feel okay wearing a fur? Would I feel okay even wearing a fake fur? HOW DID THIS TURN INTO AN ANIMAL CRUELTY POST?!


  1. omg, the "love is never having to say you're sorry" thing is bullshit and annoys the hell out of me. if you care about someone and you screw up, YOU APOLOGIZE.

    1. Dude. DUDE. Like, more than I would apologize to a stranger. We're talking naked apologies. With music.